good week

This was a fairly good week this week. Paula finished her daily radation treatment on Tuesday and so it was nice to be off with her and the kids for a couple of days. The only bad thing last week was that I had to postpone planting my garden. I got all the ground plants in radishes, beets, carrots, etc. i was also able to get my corn planted if everything turns out and grows we are going to have a lot of corn. I guess we just have to wait on see.

On Saturday Paula went to this food co-op where you we get home grown food and vegetables for a fairly cheap price generally really cheap. But while Paula was there, I guess the kids were playing with some other kids while waiting. One of the other kids started hitting Tommy D with a little flex hand type thing and and Callie decided that was mean so she started to yell at the other kid stop hitting my brother, she put her arm around him and started to comfort him, he wasn't hurt he probably was getting a kick out of it. but was so concerned with him. As they walked away she turned around and yelled "your a meanie."

Negative Perspective

It has occured to me that over the last couple of weeks I have started to fall into a negative personality. I apoligize to anyone at this time that I have made feel sad or negative as well. I am realizing that this is not what I want cause I am finding myself angry and the smallest of things. I know this isn't what is neseccary in my life. So I again I apoligize that if I have said anything that was wrong or upsetting I am truly sorry.

On a higher note Paula is doing good with all of her treatments and she only has two regular radation treatments on her breast and then one 4 hr session on her back and then we wait for a while to get all the tests redone to see if she is in full remission or not. During that waiting time she will continue to get the light treatment of chemotherapy ever three weeks. She has been able to get a grant sponsored retreat to Park City for the weekend and seems to have made some connections with people who are in the same sitituation as she is. I haven't seen her since she left but just talking to her on the phone it seems to have made her realize there are people to talk to, which if she uses it like I think this group was set up for I think she will be much better cause she will have someone to really talk to someone going through the same thing.

To quiet

I am sitting here this afternoon trying to think of what to do before I go to bed, usually the night consists of me getting home eating dinner then fighting with the kids to get their chores done before bed. Well this weekend Paula took the kids to her dad's so I have had the house to myself. Which has been nice cause the stress level for fightin with them is gone and last night was really good but tonight well it is just to quiet. To quiet for me. I guess I will close with that, and listen to well nothing.

School

Well this week has been relatively uneventful, Paula's radation is coming on and she had her another dose of chemo on Monday but seems to be doing well from both of them. The only thing is they are doing more tests to make sure the cancer hasn't spread any further. Hopefully they come back good which I am sure they will.

The big decision of this week is to go back to school or not, when Paula was diagnosed last year I had just registered for my second consecutive year at the USU extension, but I put that on hold due to the fact we didn't how long her treatments were going to be, so I asked for a year long leave of abscene, well that ends next semester so they sent a letter saying I needed to register to keep my status. I had to decide if I should go back or if I should just stay they way we are, well I decided to see if I could extend my leave another year without having to reregister and all that crap. Luckily I think I got an understanding counsler when I wrote them cause she stated here is the link to get another year, don;t worry about I will remember who you are and make sure you gfet the extra year. I am hoping to be back to school by spring semester of 2010. I guess in my line of work I have grown to always expect the worse from people but over the last year I have began to learn that most people are good people and just need to be told and they will be willing to help. I guess just because I have been out school doesn't mean I can't learn from school.